and the oscar goes to.....

So I didn't really watch the oscars other than John Stewart's opening ( can he say that stuff? meanie ), they're generally pretty boring and there are only 1 or 2 categories I really care about; on top of that I didn't see most of the top-rated movies which sweeped the nominations.

However, what I do love are the fashion choices of the evening! Here are a few of MY awards.

FOR MOST BEAUTIFUL ACTRESS:

Nicole Kidman - I love this woman. She is so striking and had the sense to divorce a CAH-RAHZY man. I also love the unusual necklace, despite the obvious 'Thoroughly Modern Millie' necklace/boob problems.

MOST TIMELESS LOOK OF THE EVENING

Penelope Cruz - timeless, elegant, so chic

CUTEST:

Miley Cyrus -but why was she there?? appropriate lack of jewelry for a teenager, appropriate dress COLOR - YAH!!

MOST LIKELY TO BE MY BEST FRIEND:

Jennifer Garner -you are adorable - A-DOR-A-BLE - love the necklace! LOVE the bracelet! love everything! I don't even mind the boring soul-less black! Can I hug you?? PS I love it when you're on Martha - I'm a martha freak too! Have your people call my people, lets do lunch.

MOST SCARY:


Don't cut me with those shoulder blades or cheekbones- you can have my wallet!! EAT A BURGER and maybe carry a baby or kitten at all times for softness. love the bracelet though

BRINGING THE 80S BACK:


Katherine Heigl - but it sort of works, right? I love that she wore color ( hint, hint Hollywood)

FOR MOST INCREDIBLE SKIN:


Anne Hathaway - so beautiful - like a geisha or 19th century courtesan - I bet it tastes like spun sugar

MOST LIKELY TO HAVE UNSIGHTLY BACK HAIR:

I love you Helen Mirren, but lose the jacket thingy -what are you hiding? You look great though!

BEST MEN'S FASHION:

long skinny black ties - bow ties are OVER -these images prove my point. Not even George Clooney can pull it off successfully.

MOST GAY:

John Travolta - tone it down, you big queen -and COME OUT

BIGGEST MISTAKE:

I know you were a stripper before writing the over-rated JUNO, but do you have to announce it like this?

MOST DESERVED AWARD:

to best song from ONCE - the most haunting melody of the year! I hummed it for weeks after seeing the movie

Overall, everyone looked great. I know people were trying to keep the tone down because of the recent writers strike but honestly, NO MORE BLACK LADIES. There's enough on the men! And to end with - this photo displays that not only is Nicole the most beautiful woman on the planet, she ALSO is nice to REALLY old men...........nuf said......... (Nicole, I heart you! )